Sha was asking why do we want to get our FIC certification last week after our attachment at Bedok FCC. Burning 3-4 hours of our "precious" book-out days for the upcoming weeks until November is no joke. Ironically, most of the 91st FS don't seems to give a hoot about it. Strange isn't it.

Actually the answer is simple. We are fighting, pathetically, for some "title" that we wanted but didn't managed to get it. Yes, it's the FS vocation.Getting FIC certification make us feel that we are closer to being a FS. Pathetic struggle isn't it? I call it "The Loser Mentality".

We laughed at the answer we gotten, but we pondered deeply. Does not being FS really matters?

To me, it used to matter a lot. Yes, it used to. I used to feel unexplained pain when I see my fellow BFSC coursemates. I feel angry to everyone and myself. I tasted the bitterness of failure and the inability to savage the situation. It's either Time that dilute those sensation or I am getting numb.

I heard complains from the 91st FS, about their job and their difficulties. Some envy me having the time to gym, to swim, to run, to do plan my time. So, who should be the one green with envy? The FS (Fitness Specialist) or the PTI (Paid to Idle)?

I am getting a little emotional. But after the experiences I got over the past months, I am contented, with what I am now, with what I am doing now.

Maybe, I am actually the lucky one?